Kitchen Cookin’

Hey you guys! Hope everyone is having a great day today! If not, I’m here if you’d like to talk about it 💙 .. I know how it feels when you don’t really have anyone to talk too, or you don’t want to feel like a burden. I’m here, always!

Growing up, I loved waking up to the smell of my mothers cooking and soulful music! It brings me back to a place of so many great memories with her. Cooking brought us closer together as a family, I believe.

My mom brought so many different versions of cooking into my life that I’ll cherish them forever. No matter how many times we bump heads, or disagree with each other cooking and music brings us closer together everytime. Believe it has been a very rocky for us over the years, but at the end of the day she is truly the rock to my foundation and I would not have it any other way.

So I’ve been hanging out with her for a few days, and this morning we brought back our kitchen cookin’. We haven’t done this in a very long time, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. The feelings that I remember as a kid just rushed back like it was yesterday 💜.

So we’re in the kitchen prepping for our dinner and Seal flowing through the speakers just like the old days. It was just a wonderful feeling you guys! Curry Chicken, White Rice, and Rape Greens (yes that is the actual name of these greens😂 so good!) was on our menu. We’re singing, reminiscing on the old days and just enjoying the moment.

Awesome Saturday for me and definately more memories that I will hold too.

Remember this: No matter the troubles in our dark skies, our mother will hold the glue that sticks us together.

💜💛💚💙💜💛💚💙💜💛💚💙💜💛

Do you guys have a memory that you and your parent(s) share all the time or occasionally? I’d like to hear about it.

🌻SincerelyBonita

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Sleepless Night

Hey you guys! Hope everyone had a great day today! If not, I’m here if you’d like to talk about it 💙 .. I know how it feels when you don’t really have anyone to talk too, or you don’t want to feel like a burden. I’m here, always!

Its currently 2:54am, and I am WIDE AWAKE! What in the world is really going on! Smh. Its been this way for the last two days, and its driving my crazy. Everybody that knows me can tell you that I love my sleep! Its gives me a sense of peace while I’m dreaming, but I can’t seem to tune into Bonìtas Dreamland 😣… Devastation!

Have you heard the saying– when you cant sleep at night its because you’re awake in someone else’s dream? Well, I wish whoever is dreaming about me right now will dream of unicorns and rainbows so I can stop tossing, turning, and coming of with more future ideas to claim😊. Seriously though 😪😪! I appreciate whoever maybe dreaming about me (positively) but Boníta would greatly appreciate if you would let her sleep now🙃

I swear the room will be so quiet, and I can hear all the chatter in my mind. It drives me a little crazy but then again I sometimes come up with some of my greatest ideas during this mind chatter. I’m going to put a pillow over my head to tune myself out…

Yeeeaahhh that didn’t work, and yes I tried! I’ve been going back and forth with myself about situations that could have went differently, or I should have said this instead of that. Blah blah blah. I wish I had a switch, to turn off nightly conversations with myself.

Does anyone else have that problem? Whats some of your “quiet the mind” techniques that work for you? Do share!

Sleepless nights have been less frequent for me the last 6 months because I love my sleep, but these past two days feel as though I’m reaping old habits. Don’t get me wrong I really like my “night owl” phase, but this “phase around” is becoming a “night and day owl”. Meaning my sleepless nights are becoming sleepless mornings as well 😪 … Thats no good!

I believe and I feel that something is bothering me, and I’m not sure whether its my depression or anxiety. I just can not seem to put my finger on it. I have to find the root to this issue soon! And I will.

Some meditation and cleansing should help. I hope!

To be continued…

🌻SincerelyBonìta

Small Encounter; Big Reward

Hey you guys! Hope everyone had a great day today! If not, I’m here if you’d like to talk about it 💙 .. I know how it feels when you don’t really have anyone to talk too, or you don’t want to feel like a burden. I’m here, always!

So yesterday I was on this app called Reddit that I’m not to familiar with, but I enjoy some of the informational readings that I come across. Anyways, I’m just scrolling through and I come across this post from someone about being excluded by their “friends”, and how it made them feel … Now I’m not they one to “pry” unless personally directed, but it was like I felt the energy from the post and it kind of hurt my heart a little — Shit! I responded. I couldn’t help myself. I felt as though whoever he was, needed to here what I had to say.

As I proceed with my response I could feel a lot of my emotion behind my words because growing up I had the same problem. Trying to please the people around me, wanting to be accepted, and not following my righteous path just to fit in with these people i called my “friends”.

Please! Do not allow yourself to lose yourself over anyone that doesn’t appreciate your presence or your friendship! Building trustworthy, sustainable friendships is hardwork. It can take a lot out of you depending on the type of souls you attract.

This person I was responding to though made it very clear that these friends excluded him because he didn’t have “themes in common!”

“Um excuse me, what in the hell does that really mean”, I thought to myself.

So anyways, I gave him a little more of Boníta’s vibes and let him know how unfair of a response that was from his friends, and that its time to find himself a new circle of people that he has things in common with. Instead of allowing him to join in, or informing him of the current “theme news of the day” they left him out. That sh*t sucks and it’s mean.

Personally I am a people person, and I can make friends with just about anyone. I really honor that trait and many more of course.

As a teenager I didn’t know how to fully walk away from a friendship that I knew weren’t good for me. My friends were all that I had, and I allowed people to take advantage and impose on my souls path. For me it was a choice to stay around these people. I wasn’t forced but I felt if I walked away I would be alone. When I started to see things for what and who they really were, I accepted it! I was able to uncover ME behind the betrayal, deceit, and fraudulent behavior. I uncovered the type of people I knew I needed to be around in order to progress in life. I knew the type of people that had my back. I knew who genuinely cared about my well-being and who did not.

Find those type of people. Find those people who want to be around you, and enjoys your presence. Find those that will tell you the truth. Who will tell you when you’re wrong, but will still have your back. Who doesn’t drain your energy with their negativity.

Furthermore, I got a couple notifications under what I had posted to him a few hours later with some positive feedback. Not only from him, but three or four other people who liked what I had to say. That made me feel so good you guys! Being in a place where I can shed light in anyone’s life makes it all worth it!

“When we learn to accept what we cannot change, and change what we can, life becomes a little more brighter!”

As I look back at my life, I’m glad I’ve experienced the things that I have, the people that I’ve crossed paths with, and the consequences I’ve encountered because I wouldn’t be where I am now! Trust the process!

🌻SincerelyBoníta

Thoughts

I don’t think I’ve ever been this nervous to speak on a topic since I ran for Treasurer in high school! (I did my thing by the way, and won! Yayyy me!) It feels like ever since I decided to test the waters with my #BloggingExperiment I can’t seem to think of much to say. Lol. That’s funny to me because I always have something to say 😁.. I think it’s the thought of a wide variety of “strangers” reading my work, makes me a little embarrassed 😣 But then again I’m doing something that I love, so why not make the best of it. Right? Of course! Can’t live life in the dark forever, and success doesn’t come to those that wait.

I have a lot to say and I know somebody may need to hear it, or has experienced it, or is experiencing it. Uplifting, and motivating people is something that gives me purpose. If I can’t help someone (even when I can’t help my damn self 💙) I honestly feel “not needed” and “useless”. I think I have so much to offer, but as times change so does how you’re judged in this society.

Not everyone truly wants to see the next person doing better then they are, so it makes it kind of hard when you reach out for a little moral support and reassurrance. You’d think that family, and friends would be your biggest supporters, but really they’re your worst critics. Sad but true! Now don’t get me wrong, it can be a good thing… hell a great thing but sometimes it just doesn’t mix.

I’ve learned over the years that you have to be your own supporter, your own motivater, and even your own cheerleader in order to obtain the courage to put your best foot forward. I know its exhausting, and sometimes heartbreaking not to have the people you thought would be rooting for you– doing just that, but it’s okay! Do not limit yourself because of it.

Do not put a stop to your goals, and life’s progression due to other people’s lack of selflessness and support!(Thank you Tia for your words😙) Life goes on; time waits for no one, so make it count!

If I knew what I know 10-15 years ago, oh man, I’d truly be a BOSS! I’m human, I’ve fucked up, and I wake up every morning (blessed) with a clean slate to forgive yesterday, and live for a new today! I can’t undo what I’ve done in my past, but I will move forward in hopes for a brighter future.

🌻SincerelyBoníta

“You are only confined by the walls you build yourself”-unknown

Who Am I?

I am Boníta🌻 I am my own Perfect Imperfection. I Love. I Hurt. I Cry. I Laugh. I Joke. I Smile. I Frown. I Was. I Can. I Used To. I Will. I Believe. I Dream. I Hope. I am Me. I am my Greatest Truth. I am a Friend. I am a Confidant. I am a Leader. I am Selfless. I am Outspoken. I am Authentic. I am Reassuring. I am a Daughter. I am a Sister. I am Motivation. I am Strength. I am Versatile. I am Beautiful. I am Creative. I am Family. I am Fiesty. I am Raw. I am Life. I am Caring. I am Humble. I am Different. I am Unique. I am Judged, but I am Me…. I am Boníta 🌻 and I Love Her!

Thank you for following my #BloggingExperiment! I am fairly new to this, and I’d love to have you guys following my journey as I progress.. I am working hard to bring my truth into your life, and hopefully help you conquer any hardships you may be facing or trying to overcome! I’m not perfect. I am human too. Not everyone needs a high paid SHRINK that asks “How does that make you feel” 1000x over, maybe we’d appreciate someone who will actually LISTEN and UNDERSTAND! This is my NO JUDGEMENT ZONE. BE RESPECTFUL OF ME, AND THE NEXT PERSON.. I am sharing real life issues and problems someone could be facing. Speak Up and Reach Out… You’re not alone!

🌻SincerelyBoníta

” You have to get so sure in who you are that no one’s opinion, rejection, or bad behavior can fuck up your vibe!” — unknown